Dear Summer Institute

Dear Summer Institute,

            You say you wanna revolution?  We all wanna change the world.  The theme of revolution has been so completely woven into our summer institute.  We didn’t have words for it the first few days, but as the threads of our institute were woven together, we began to be able to name some of the development that was taking place.  For me, as a teacher, I am aware of just how closely our themes of revolution line up with our three strands of the teacher--writer, inquirer, and professional.  I think Melissa kicked off the revolution with her talk of social action, 

Rashid gave it a name through his demo, and each person contributed to it through their demos, discussions, and willingness to think. 

There is so much to talk about in this time, and I'm sure I could never ever cover it all or possibly even put words to my experiences here.  And our experiences here.  Because so much of what we did was corporate, shared, riffing off one another.    There's no way these thoughts can be segmented out, but to keep myself on track, I'll talk about the three strands and how it applies to my SI experience. 

Teacher as Writer

One of the areas that I’ve really been developing the most is through my development as a writer.  When we wrote our writing stories on the first day of SI, I started reflecting and the Murray cards pushed me to think about my stories.  I still am not “Writer.”  I think I’m a writer, but to claim the Writer identity is a scary thing for me.  

My digital writing history was a piece that pushed me to really reflect on why I "didn't" write for years outside of school.  On the first day I reflected, trying to figure out why I had always loved stories, but I never considered myself a writer:  Day 1 Reflection.   Here is where I started to push on the ideas that I saw weaving together of theater, reading, and stories.  I knew they were somehow all apart of my writer identity, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it yet.  

I branched out throughout the SI, pushing myself to write poetry--a genre that had previously scared me. For some reason it was too personal, too iffy.  However, during Rebecca's session about Scranimals, I pushed myself in writing a poem.  And it was something that was very personal, discussing my writing history and my mixed identity as a writer.  The Mustnotshouldbe Writer was shared on E-Anthology, and I was amazed at the number of comments that I got.  

My self-selected piece sprang out of the Murray cards.  By thinking back on my history as a storyteller, and my secret adventures in my "spot", I tried to push myself again to write outside my comfort zone.  I really struggled through the writing of this piece, because I was unsure of where to go.  It highlighted for me the anxiety that exists for me when I'm without boundaries.  I didn't know where to take this piece.  Using Cindy's revision strategies, I moved toward a double-voiced description.  

Seeing my stories with fresh eyes, re-visioning pushed me to see my writing with new eyes.  For me, this teacher as writer strand laid the groundwork for the revolution.

Teacher as Inquirer

Like I said earlier in this post, much of my writing history is connected to my acting history.  The improvisational warm-ups we did each day involved our body and minds.  The riffing circle was one that I particularly connected with, drawing on my theater experience with similar games.  It also allowed us to use each others' energy and ideas to create new moments of learning. 

 

These games pushed me to think about the performativity of the classroom and the links between theater and English.  This is an area that I am interested in pursuing beyond SI, and my discussions with Lil and others have enabled me to make use of my knowledge of theater (which I saw as separate from English) to enrich the classroom.  

My writing history also pushed me to see the links between storytelling as an actor and the written word of the classroom.  

As I'm inquiring about these things, I looked up several articles about performance, presence, and absence.  Similarly in the classroom, a teacher has presence in the classroom, and it is how they construct that presence (or lack thereof) that dictates the way that students respond to him/her and the classroom culture.  In this blog entry, I hashed out certain links that I was seeing and tried to make connections between my two worlds--realizing that they were one world that were all constructed by me.  

My grounding as a writer led me to my inquiry.  It grew out of my identity struggle as a writer, and SI caused me to reflect and to try to synthesize seemingly disjointed "Carrie" identities in a way that makes meaning.  

 Teacher as Professional


Thinking about the three strands of teaching, teacher as professional was the one that I was unsure about.  I didn't feel like much of a professional--I'm the baby of the group.  Would people really respect what I had to say?  Did I have anything to say?

Above is an illustration of me breathing out and breathing in with Sally about writing.  I was letting go of anxiety, fear of being the newby.  And this community welcomed me in, treating me as a professional and establishing the professional conversation which will be ongoing.  

 Ashley's demo marked a milestone for me.  My group watched a video about child homelessness in Florida.  Lacy, Jen, Aileen and I got upset.  I cried. I got mad.  We slammed sticky notes.  And we started to think of what we could do together. And what it meant to be educators in a world where this was reality.  And what it looked like to challenge that reality.

We thought we wanted . . . a revolution.

Similarly, as we moved into thinking about our portfolios, the assessment weight dragged us down.  We performed a tableau about assessment, once again links our minds and bodies, and my inquiry and work as a professional.

This day was one that I felt drew us together as professionals.  We all shared this burden together.  And then threw the next few days, we worked to find a way to revolt.

In this moment, I imagined the possibilities for revolution and what it looks like in response to and in conjunction with evolution.  An evolution seems easier and a more likely thing to hope for, but a revolution seems more effective.  As professionals, we banded together and decided to revolt.  But what would that look like?  I blogged about the soundtrack to the revolution in my mind and it became a multi-voiced discussion, including Lacy, Melissa, and Tony.  We compiled lyrics and music all about revolution.  

Similar to revolution collaboration, we shared ideas for lessons and professional development, like Aileen's Image Grammar demo.

 Dorry and Jen's demos on Thursday I felt were the peak of our professional collaboration.  Dorry asked us how we wanted to change teacher perception and made us brainstorm practical ways to do that.

Jen's demo on assessment pushed us for practical solutions to the question of assessment.  Brainstorming a list together and hearing about the things that we can do instead of the things we can't, opened up a word of possibilities.  

Telling our teacher stories and hearing that they mattered affirmed our unity as a group of teachers.  Years ago, I had written about feeling backed into a corner by the educational system.  But I wrote a line that stands out in my memory to this day.  I developed the thought that I was glad that in that corner I was not standing alone--there were others who had my back and who were willing to battle their way out with me.  I imagined the three musketeers, covering each other backs and working their way out of "tight" spots.  As professionals, we are better united.  

We say we want a revolution.  So let's change the world.  

Thank you, fellow SIers.  :)  We rock.